Copyright 2006 Deborah Torres Patel
This 3 part article series tells you how to say the right thing in awkward situations. In part two you will discover how to deal with colleagues who are speaking untruths or are gossiping about you, your boss or someone you know, subtly let your date know they have broccoli stuck in their teeth and decline a friend's request to borrow a large amount of cash.
Part 2
SITUATION 6
You walk into the pantry, right into colleagues who are gossiping about you
WHAT TO SAY
“Excuse me. I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation about me. Have I done anything to offend either/any of you? If so, I’m open to discussion and apologize if I’ve inadvertently done something to upset you. I will gladly take responsibility for my actions. Would you like to have a talk now?”
SITUATION 7
Your colleagues start to gossip about your boss but you want no part of it
WHAT TO SAY
“I make it a practice not to say anything about a person when they are not present unless it’s positive. I don’t mean to offend you and have no judgment about your conversation. I’d just rather not participate. If you don’t mind, I’ll excuse myself and get back to work.”
SITUATION 8
You’re seated across your partner at a function and notices that he has vegetable lodged in his teeth
WHAT TO SAY
Put a finger or toothpick against your own teeth directly opposite/mirroring the placement of the lodged vegetable in your partner’s tooth. Tap your tooth exactly where the food is and he should get the point.
If that doesn’t work, excuse yourself from the table as if you were visiting the restroom and either SMS him or walk by his chair telling him discretely on your way out or get him to come along with you.
SITUATION 9
A friend, who’s in dire straits, tries to borrow a large sum of money from you but you want to reject him
WHAT TO SAY
“I’m sorry I can’t help you out with a loan right now. I have personal and professional obligations limiting my current cash flow. I cannot put those that depend on me financially in jeopardy. My lending money would be irresponsible given our circumstances. I hope you can understand that.”
SITUATION 10
A colleague confronts you about something awful you were supposed to have said or done but didn’t
WHAT TO SAY
“Wow - I’m shocked! I would never do anything like that to you. Who told you such a thing? I give you my word it is completely untrue. I honestly don’t understand why she would say that. Shall we go together to speak with her about it directly?”
Deborah Torres Patel is an internationally acclaimed expert on self expression and the fine arts of voice & communication. To receive ongoing tips & subscribe for complimentary online training sign up at www.expressingyou.com .
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