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Hillary Clinton To Become Republican
Hillary Clinton, long famously popular among Democrats but obsessively excoriated by Republicans, has decided to turn the tables on her opponents by becoming one of them.

In an interview

Swift Bank To Comply Slower
Just when George Bush was winning a victory in the Senate for the right to handle terrorists in a moderately terrifying way, it looks as if he can expect slower help from Swift, the Belgian banking c

The Clever Bluegill Sunfish It Can Detect Toxins In Water Better Than A High Tech Wonder
This week we’re excused from having to pick our Clever Monkey of the Week from the human performers on the world’s stage, because they’ve been outdone by the bluegill sunfish. This clever denizen of

Hockey Summer Season Will Be Played On Roller Skates
Professional hockey associations, long mournful of the unfortunately seasonal nature of their game, have decided to give the boys of summer a run for their money.

To effect the balmy tra

Florida Man Attacks Alligator Saves Golden Retriever
A Florida man, who went for a stroll by a pond with his 3-month-old golden retriever, heard the dog squeal and turned to see the unlucky pup in the clenched jaws of an alligator.

The man

NewsLaugh s Clever Monkey of the Week King Abdullah For OK If Obvious Talk In A NO K Time
We were in a downcast mood, seemingly without any hope of hearing from an enlightened person in the Middle East, when suddenly there was the level-headed man from Jordan, King Abdullah, speaking, in

The American Umpire Conducting The American Empire In A Way That s As Fair As The Calls In Yankee Stadium
We were sitting here trying, as usual, to figure out how today’s America, saddled with the burdens of inadvertent empire, could conduct itself in the world so Americans are happy about how we’re doin

A Condom by Any Other Name
Condoms, jimmies, rubbers…you might think you’ve heard them all. Condoms are one of the world’s most common prophylactics. Here are 5 things that you might not otherwise know about condoms and their

Bible Belt May Finally Consent To A Belt Of Booze
73 years after the end of Prohibition, the Bible Belt still won’t consent to a belt of booze. But change seems to be brewing.

It appears that the usual reformers of restraints to trade,

Pope to Rule On Condoms And AIDS May Consult People With Hands On Experience
Pope Benedict, taking an unexpected and courageous step, has asked for recommendations from fellow ecclesiastics about whether or not a couple, in which one member has AIDS, may use condoms for the p

Quick Question Does God Advocate Murder
It appears, scandalously enough, to be the question Islamic terrorism foists on us. Of course, there are times when a chancy question can diplomatically be allowed to slip by unanswered, especially b

I ll Get Up In Just A Minute
Are you one of those people who wake up in the morning, fully refreshed and singing with happiness at the start of a bright new day?

Well, most of us aren't. And frankly, we'd rather tho

Iranian President Ahmadinejad Sits Right Down And Pretends To Write Bush A Letter
Last week, upstart Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmandinejad sat right down and, ostensibly, wrote George Bush a letter, in which he lectured him on the evils of “freedom and democracy,” while pontifica

The Perks of Global Warming
Marya Mannes once wrote, “The earth we abuse and the living things we kill will, in the end, take their revenge; for in exploiting their presence we are diminishing our future.” Obviously Ms. Mannes

New Surgeon General s Warning Caution Eating Spinach May Be Hazardous To Your Health
The surgeon general, noting the widely publicized outbreak of e.coli in 20 or so states, has issued a new health warning on spinach.

There were, of course, comments aplenty in the press

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